Let's Get Real For a Minute

As I scrolled through Twitter a few weeks back, I discovered an apology from a well known actress to a well known football player. She said in an interview that this said football player had ignored her at a function and she blamed it on not looking thin/pretty/etc. Of course she received a huge negative response because this was actually a figment of her imagination and the football player wasn’t ignoring her for any of those reasons- Hence, the public apology.

Skip to even more recent events when a certain author did not make it on a famous person’s “reading list” and threw a fit on her social media accounts that some other woman got it because she was blond and thin. (Something of the sorts) Again, all of this is her opinion and not at all factual.

And here I sit, thinking to myself in a rather loud voice, “This is why we are still stuck in prisons we’ve created ourselves.” Because the lesson I learned from both of these examples are: you can’t undo what’s done so unfortunately two individuals are suffering from these people’s insecurities. And that we are forever passing the blame on others for what we secretly think of ourselves. It’s okay to feel sorry for yourself and maybe a bit let down when things do not go your way, but NOT at the expense of others. There comes a time where we can’t just blame the magazines, the media, or the past for how we treat other human beings.

We have GOT TO STOP placing our value and self worth on what others do, look like, say, etc., because honestly, it’s not about them, it’s about us. I can remember back in my early twenties getting so upset that a certain ex-coworker of mine was in fantastic shape and had so much self control over her body. It got to the point where my mind secretly cut her down for the flaws I could find and I ended up not liking her very much. How pathetic for me to miss out on a terrific REAL friendship because she enjoyed taking care of her body and I was simply too lazy to do the same?

We have to stop the cycle. We have to start practicing what we preach. We can’t be jealous of others and their successes just because we do not have the same. Whether it’s our looks, our careers, our families, etc., we are all just trying to be the best version of ourselves and that’s going to be ruined completely if we keep comparing ourselves to every other person out there.

It’s hard and I know that putting in the work is so much harder than belittling the ones that do, but unless we make the effort, we have zero room to talk. Think about how many women are out there feeling completely worthless and could use a good friend who just “gets it” vs. someone who finds all the excuses not to.

I like to take candid shots of my son, my family, and often silly selfies. But there are days I wonder what my heart would look like if it could take a selfie. Hmm, I think I’ll leave it at that.

~K